Scrjbbles: J's random writings

Have you ever been in a foreign country by yourself? I have.

I remember the newness. Hearing a different language. Seeing wordless signs that don’t exist at home. The red circle with the diagonal red slash across the middle which means do not enter. No need for words in my native language, just the symbol. I get it. 

In a new place. I must maneuver on my own. No guide. Helpful strangers notice the quizzical confusion on my face and are kind to ask if they may assist.  Phew.  Thanks, and yes please.

Kindness is universal when shared, isn’t it?

Onward. I make my way, in my own way.

So, if I’m in a foreign place alone, chances are I came here for a reason. Work? Funeral? Pleasure of going anywhere new? Desperation for discovery of place? Or discovery of self, perhaps?

Do you know that scary thrill of not knowing exactly where you’re going, or even where you are at that moment? Me too. Once I’ve navigated the trains, buses, taxis, foot travel — any or all of the above — I arrive at my temporary “home” destination. Check in. Check out the basics.

Whump–as I set down my bag. Peel the camera bag slung across my torso.  Hmmm.  See the room; sense the light, colors, décor, scents in the air. Where is the bathroom? Is the water warm? Breathe. I made it. Sense accomplishment for the many hurdles I’ve already overcome even though I’ve only just arrived.

Settle my things a bit. Though they really aren’t totally settled, just as I am not. This isn’t home. This is a new place. Everything here is new to me, though seemingly familiar too. There is a bed. There might be a shelf in the bathing space, or there may only be a simple nail on which to hang my stuff. Hang on a feeling. Hang on period. Universal–a nail on a wall. For millennia people have hung items from projectiles. Food on a branch. Tote bag on an outcropping. Clothing on a shrub. Nothing new about that.

Alone. Solo. Single. Uno. Sans another. Myself in a foreign environment. Take in the space. Make a new familiarity. How did I get here? Where to go next?

Rest a spell. Then it’s time to explore.

Grab my camera bag. Make mental notes on how to find my way back to the new “X” that marks my spot.

Outside, which way to go? Left. Right? Straight? I don’t know yet. Choose one. Take a step, then another. Where will my steps take me? The only guarantee is that it will be somewhere new to me. Beyond that, all sure bets are off. A café? A store for supplies? A hut? Do I have enough local currency? How much do things cost here? How can I tell? Will I understand? Will locals work to understand me? Merchants will, yes. Others, who knows? I bet if I smile they will.

Smiles are universal when shared, aren’t they?

As is the mild, yet welcome, discomfort of experiencing everything new.

I love it and I’m only a little scared so far. Fear rises, sometimes in an instant, sometimes gradually, and sometimes it simply snakes from my brain down to my lungs. Can I get through the fear? Yes. There is no other choice. Proceed despite the “scaredy cat” feeling. Then the fear eases. What replaces it? Curiosity certainly. Navigating is also a good replacement. The eagerness for discovery, mostly. What is everything like in this place? I’m so thrilled to be finding out. Wow, fear turned to elation in a hurry. How exciting! Both feelings are exhilarating.

Onward. I am going. My adventurous self is drinking in EVERYTHING. I am hyper alert. Sights. Sounds. Smells. Pathways. Everything.  Discovery is itself a balm for my wanderlust soul. Learning moment to moment. Could freefall. Probably won’t. Keep going.

Pause. Raise camera to my eye. Wink. Compose. Click the shutter. I want to save this visual. Making material memory for later recall. I love doing this!!! I am a saver.

Mental note: I can stop again in this spot if I need to later. Store. Food stall. Bathroom. Remember where. If I do return, then this new place switches to the familiar category. I will have been here before. I will have memory of it. I will have had experience with it. Check and check. Not so scary now.

More steps. I am here, new, and it’s all becoming familiar with each breath. Wow!

What’s next?!